Love Yourself
Love is not only a feeling. It is a verb - an ACTION. When I realized this, my life changed.
Take a moment to think about what it means to love a baby.
- You listen for the baby's feelings and attend to
distress immediately. You keep the baby monitor on when the baby is
sleeping, so you know when the baby needs you.
- You hold and comfort the baby when he/she needs comforting, keeping
your heart open to the baby so the baby feels your love and presence.
- You do all you can to create physical health for the baby.
- You mirror what is wonderful about the baby.
- You let the baby know, in many different ways, that he or she is vitally important to you.
Not only do you feel love for a baby - you act on it. Now imagine
that you have a baby inside you who needs all these same things.
Loving
yourself means:
Embracing all your feelings with caring,
compassion, gentleness, tenderness, and a desire to learn what your
feelings are telling you. Just as a baby's feelings are informational,
letting you know that the baby is hungry, lonely, physically hurting or
uncomfortable, your feelings are also always informational. Your
feelings are letting you know whether you are caring about yourself or
abandoning yourself, whether others are being loving or unloving,
whether a situation is safe or dangerous, whether you need to be kind
and compassionate with the deeper feelings of heartbreak and grief.
Now reading this seems a little crazy... Months ago I thought loving yourself and thinking positively should be a natural thing that just happens with no effort. It blows me away that you have to remind yourself everyday and practice it. I don't understand how humans got to the point where we don't know how to love or help ourselves, but I am so happy I have learned how to practice these things before it was too late!
How To Start:
1. Begin your day with love (not technology). Remind
yourself of your worthiness before getting out of bed. I watch a motivational youtube video every morning (I guess this is half love and half technology). On the mornings I don't, I can tell a difference on my outlook for the day, which affects my mood and my success that day.
2. Take time to mediate and journal. Spend time focusing inward daily. Begin with 5 minutes of meditation and 5 minutes of journaling each morning or night. I try to journal once a day! Just write 3 positive things about your day down on paper!
3. Talk yourself happy. Use affirmations to train your mind to become more positive.Use post-it's on your mirror that you use in the morning!!
4. Get emotionally honest. Let of go of numbing your feelings. Shopping, eating, and drinking are examples of avoiding discomfort, sadness, and pain. I used to spend to much money, binge eat, and drink alcohol everyday... until I realized why I was doing it.
5. Expand your interests. Try something new. Learn a
language. Go places you’ve never been. Do things you haven’t done
before. You have a right to an awesome life.
6. Enjoy life enhancing activities. Find exercise you like. Discover healthy foods that are good for you. Turn off technology for a day and spend time doing things that make you feel alive.
7. Become willing to surrender. Breathe, relax, and let go.
You can never see the whole picture. You don’t know what anything is
for. Stop fighting against yourself by thinking and desiring people and
events in your life should be different. Your plan may be different from your soul’s intentions.
8. Work on personal and spiritual development. Be
willing to surrender and grow. Life is a journey. We are here to learn
and love on a deeper level. Take penguin steps and life becomes
difficult. One step at a time is enough to proceed forward.
9. Own your potential. Love yourself enough to believe in the limitless opportunities available to you. Take action and create a beautiful life for yourself.
10. Be patient with yourself. Let go of urgency and
fear. Relax and transform striving into thriving. Trust in yourself, do
good work, and the Universe will reward you.
11. Live in appreciation. Train your mind to be grateful. Appreciate your talents, beauty, and brilliance. Love your imperfectly perfect self.
12. Be guided by your intuition. All answers come
from within. Look for signs and pay attention to your gut feelings.
You’ll hear two inner voices when you need to make a decision. The quiet
voice is your higher self; the loud voice is your ego. Always go with
the quieter voice.
13. Do what honors and respects you. Don’t
participate in activities that bring you down. Don’t allow toxic people
in your life. Love everyone, but be discerning on who you allow into
your life.
14. Accept uncertainty.
Suffering comes from living in the pain of the past or the fear of the
future. Put your attention on the present moment and be at peace.
15. Forgive yourself. Learn from your mistakes and
go forward. Use this affirmation, “I forgive myself for judging myself
for __________ (fill in the blank i.e.: for getting sick, for acting
out, for not doing your best.)
16. Discover the power of fun. Self-love requires
time to relax, play, and create face-to-face interaction with others.
Our fast-paced world creates a goal setting, competitive craziness that
doesn’t leave room for play. Dr. Stuart Brow says, “The opposite of play isn’t work, it is depression.”
17. Be real. Speak up and speak out. Allow yourself to be seen, known, and heard. Get comfortable with intimacy (in-to-me-see).
18. Focus on the positive. Go to your heart and dwell on and praise yourself for what you get right in all areas.
19. Become aware of self neglect and rejection. Become conscious of your choices. Ask yourself several times throughout the day, “Does this choice honor me?”
20. Imagine what your life would look like if you believed in your worth. Dedicate your life to loving you. Make it your main event.
21. Seek professional help. Self-rejection and
neglect is painful. You deserve to be happy. You have a right to be
accepted and loved. If necessary, seek help from a support group,
counselor, or coach. It’s the best investment you can make.
I know this was long - but as I read every single 21 points, they were so true and honest, that I had to post them all. All I can do is hope to inspire you to love yourself. If you don't enough, if your negative voice in your head is louder than your postivie, practice these things, say them outloud. If it's too hard, get help, you deserve it.
I say this in the car on the way to school every morning:
~ Love is our purpose, our true calling. It begins with and within each of us. ~
