Happy MoNdAy!

Facebook Friends = Real Friends?

"Facebook Makes Us All Sad Because Everyone is Happy But Us." 

This was the title of a real article I found.

Apparently, it's a human habit to overestimate others' happiness. It's also very human to compare ourselves with others. So, if we think other people are happy, and we're not happy, we get even sadder thinking about other people's happiness. Thinking that other people are happy and knowing we're not, we feel more alone in our suffering.

Facebook is yet another place, where we're constantly up against the "grass is always greener" mentality.  Facebook is a place to showcase our latest accomplishments and most flattering pictures and if someone else posts a bad picture you don't like, you can un-tag it. How safe is that?! 

What if we could delete or un-tag our real lives? Well, we can't, which is why facebook is so unrealistic.

By being able to see just the good stuff, scrolling down our Facebook news feed feeds into our misapprehension that other people's lives are perfectly happy.

Even before reading these articles, I know I am an example of this. I'm not quite at the point that I believe all of my friends are happier than I am. But, I've noticed that I don't usually post a status update when I have a bad day or a negative experience. 

 I use my facebook as the positive, happy, inspiring side of myself. OF COURSE there is also struggle, insecurities, and some sinicism in my life... otherwise, why would I need all of the encouragement? Why else would I think other people need the inspiration?

So, what can we do when friends are brave and do post the tough stuff online? When someone's status reflects a job loss or a breakup or a death in the family, there isn't a Facebook button that allows us to "Care." The virtual hug symbol ain't gonna cut it. You need to reach out to your "friends" IN PERSON!! 

Don't forget that the imperfect person you are in real life is what people relate to... not the perfect person with the perfect pictures on facebook.

 The increase in connecting through social media and technology is causing a loss of connections in person. This is what is changing our society. I like change, but I think this is a huge reason that things like depression, anxiety, obesity, and suicide have increased hugely over the last couple years. 

We are a new society of "alone together". We are close to each other, in the same room, but we forgot how to connect with people emotionally.

So if you are a great facebook or social media person like me, don't forget to talk to those people in person too!  

Let's create real life friends out of our "facebook friends".

Believe me, if people already know you through facebook, all it takes is a, "Hey girl, I see you on facebook all the time, just though I'd come say hi!". 

And just like that.. YOU just beat the social media loneliness bridge of our society... Maybe we can beat depression, anxiety, and obesity together next ;)

~ Are your facebook "friends", real friends?~

DO IT

FrIdAy!

March Application

Apply NOW for my March fitness group: https://joycefollows.wufoo.com/forms/zg637f21j339lo/

Silver Lining

 How To Find Your Silver Lining:

Let's say you are in a situation in which you consider bad luck, karma, waste of time, sucky, miserable... and the list goes on. How many of these things are in your life?!

How do you escape the shitty feeling that comes with those things? By finding the silver lining.

When you are in that moment, ask yourself:

1. How can I use this situation as a gateway to learning something about myself, and then change for the better?

2. How could this positively affect me?

3. How will this make me stronger and better?

4. How does this relate to my life purpose? 

Success is a function of your ability to be at peace with the following truth: Everything that happens to you is exactly what is supposed to happen to you.  

5. What can I learn from this?

 
6. What is the hidden treasure inside this person that maybe others don’t see? What makes this person special?

This SAVES me when I am stuck in situations with people I clash with, it really helps!
 
7. Where is the gift in this? 

You should be able to come up with an honest positive answer to these questions in any situation. If not, you are trying too hard to stay negative.

 REMEMBER: If you can’t think of anything nice to say, you’re not very creative.

Fight Self-Doubt

Self-doubt is one of the major obstacles to living the life you truly deserve. This unhealthy food for the soul drags down your spirit, crushes your ambitions, and prevents you from achieving all that you can. We all have those inner voices inside our heads that tell us we are not good enough, not strong enough and incapable of doing the things we dream of. Often, these feelings of weakness or incompetence stem from childhood and become ingrained in our very being. Over time, self-doubt can lead to problems with anxiety and depression, which in turn can lead to serious physical ailments like weight gain, high blood pressure, chronic fatigue and even increased mortality rates among those with heart disease. 

So let's beat this negativity so that you can enjoy a joyful, productive and fulfilling life.

Tips for Dealing With Self-Doubt 

1. Live in the Present

Most of the time, feelings of self-doubt are attached to memories of times in the past when you failed to achieve something or when somebody else told you that you were not good enough. Don't dwell on those moments. Try to ground yourself and think about the now. Just because you weren't able to accomplish something before doesn't mean you can't do it again. Every day is a new start and a new chance to go for what you really want.

2. Trust in Yourself 

Sometimes we can be our own worst enemies. If you tell yourself that you cannot do something, then you probably won't even try it in the first place. Have faith in yourself, tell yourself that you are just as capable as the next person of achieving your dreams, and stop listening to the voice inside that keeps saying "I can't."

3. Counteract the Negative 

At times it may seem as though the negative voices in your head are stronger than the positive voices. Try to be aware of this when it happens, and make a concerted effort to counteract these negative thoughts with positive energy. When you feel a negative thought coming on, simply remind yourself about the things you like about yourself, your strengths, and all of the things you have achieved in your life and are proud of. Try reciting empowering affirmations. 

4. Find the Source of Your Self-Doubt 

If you find yourself constantly telling yourself you are not good enough, you may want to find the root of the problem. Where did these feelings originate? Was there a specific event that has caused you to harbor such feelings? You can choose to do this on your own or with the help of a professional therapist. Once you identify and understand the source of the problem, you can begin to work toward eliminating those negative thought patterns. 

5. Spend Time With Others

Friends and family are an invaluable source of strength, reassurance and encouragement. In fact, studies suggest that people who have strong social support have fewer cardiovascular issues and lower levels of cortisol, otherwise known as the stress hormone, when compared to people with fewer friends. Even strangers can be surprisingly positive and helpful when it comes to self-doubt. Simply voicing your self-doubt to others can often put it in perspective and make you realize how illogical this negativity can be. In addition, other people can offer advice and support that will motivate you and give you a huge confidence boost.

The simple act of believing in yourself, trusting the process, and trusting that you will know what to do when the time comes can greatly relieve your self-doubt. Practice staying present in the moment and try not to regret the past or worry about the future. 

~ When you get scared or doubtful, just say, "I CAN HANDLE IT" out loud. I still do this at least 5 times a day. I promise it works! ~